REFLECTIONS, ENLIGHTENMENT AND LEARNING FROM PAST EXPERIENCES
Commentary by the Duchess

All of us, over the course of our lifetime, experience many different levels of friendship with individuals. Whether it’s with men or women. Throughout the years I've learned it’s important to remember there are different levels regarding friends, acquaintances and even lovers. One shouldn't confuse the whole lot, as that can lead to anger, suffering and disenchantment. Human nature being what it is ... we sometimes forget or get lost in the emotion. All those experiences and encounters [whether good, bad or indifferent] are an essential learning tool to ones developing maturity. [Not easily understood by teenagers and even in some adults.] As well as leading onward to new experiences, if you allow that to happen in a healthy manner.

Sometimes the breakup of a relationship or long-term friendship can result in a catalyst to new experiences, as well as friendships. [Closing the mind to that is damaging to the soul.] Two "long-term friendship" breakups that stand out in my mind happened 25 years apart from one another. And yet, both were major catalysts for me into new realms of thought, experiences and outlook on life. Sadly, the first incident [1977] was of my own doing and the second incident [2003] was not. The deeds and roles had been reversed. Funny how that happens, yah know. [And I don't mean funny ha-ha.] Of the first, it took me many years of reflection to come to grips with the situation. And ever since then I've tried to rectify it on numerous occasions. Unfortunately with no real success and I'm finally able to accept that. As to the other individual ... apparently she hasn't been able to move on and is still in the disenchantment phase.

Regarding the second and more recent situation [which was emotionally painful for me], I engaged in deep reflection in the months that followed. I also had some in-depth discussions with several friends, acquaintances and professionals. These conversations were a great source of enlightenment. In recent months, I've come to realize that I'm truly thankful for the vicious way this individual broke off a long friendship. Yes, I know, that sounds abit odd, but it’s true. I really am thankful. And if I ran into that person today, I'd say "thank you, I harbor neither grievances nor animosity". None what so ever. The situation was a catalyst for me and propelled me to were I am today. I am a vibrant productive being ... not some insignificant worthless being. We're all vibrant, special human beings. Don't let someone put you down, cause their just a bully with lots of insecurity issues. Rise above it all and take on new, happy, healthy experiences.

Peace ... Love ... Justice ... Solidarity ... Hope